I’d rather Mas-Debate.

Watching the Presidential Debates was like watching political paint dry. Boring!!! Who needs the pretense of questions when answers will be only half given at best. They are both liars and panders, they have to be. Hell, you lie on your job interviews, “my weakness? Uh… I never… give up? ” Crock of shit.

Here’s how we pick the President. We toss a lit fuse bomb and who ever can catch it by raising his arms above his head wins.

It must be said that you need to be phyiscally fit before taking office. How can you be a lame, aging, dying President when even the littlest jobs require physicals?!?

Newman.Owned!

Rest In Peace Paully.

Bernie Won’t Burn. Goes Straight to the Laugh Factory in Heaven.

“The world just got a little less funny,” said “Oceans” co-star George Clooney.

Don Cheadle, another member of the “Oceans” gang, concurred: “This is a very sad day for many of us who knew and loved Bernie. He brought so much joy to so many. He will be missed, but heaven just got funnier.”

Apparently Heaven’s now funnier and the World, lesser so. God loves a good Dick Joke.

Scarlett Johansson ‘Name Drops’ Kal Penn

Way to Go Kumar!!!

Morgan Freeman (The OG Batman) Puts Down the Coffee and Picks Up the Sugar.

White Chicks, Man.

Obama Calls Black People “You Guys” Whilst Heckled in Florida.

Florida!!!!! Not You Again!!!!!!

Barack Picks Hillary to Be His VP and Fuck Buddy.

Be Honest. That gets you hot?

Common is a Vegetarian But Loves Big Macs!(It’s OK) He’s also Gay and Dates Women.

Got Beef? Not With this Burger$$$.

Gossip Girl’s New ‘Racy’ Ad Campaign.

I Think They Meant Inapparent.

And You Thought Seinfeld Was a Show Where Insignificance Happened.

Batman Beats Up Mom and Sis After They See Mamma Mia Instead of The Dark Knight.

Take That Abba Fans!